side boob

Day One: Cut a bitch

Day Two Hunger strike

Day Three: Launch a new line of fashionable, designer SCRAM bracelet caddies

Day Four: Give birth to baby made before going to jail.  Send this baby direct to DVD.

Day Five: Get some much needed rest.

Day Six: See just how green your thumb is in the prison garden!

Day Seven: Enjoy a good dump.

Day Eight: Uphold New Year's resolution for 20% more side boob.

Day Nine: "While away the hours, conferrin' with the flowers, consultin' with the rain. And my head I'd be scratchin' while my thoughts were busy hatchin'...."

Day Ten: Use (1) phone call to finally join Quest personals.  'Cause, "you don't have to be alone tonight -PICK UP THE PHONE!"

Day Eleven: Get philanthropic 'n shit with your favorite charity: Shots for Tots

Day Twelve: Make up with dad.  ....or maybe just enjoy a mess hall smoothie.

Day Thirteen: Take advantage of vocational opportunities to join the ranks of the prison volunteer fire department.

Day Fourteen: Outfit the whole place in fancy new window treatments.

Day Fifteen: Remake Mean Girls.  Only this time the mean girls are really mean -like, kill you mean.

Day Sixteen: Absolutely, positively do not do all the contraband cocaine in the joint off this mirror. Like, don't.  For reals.

Day Seventeen: Utilize laundry room steam press to create hysterically ironic Jersey Shore inspired transfer t's!  Dibs on the D.A.R.E. one!

Day Eighteen: Find a hotter girlfriend.

Day Nineteen: Rehearse for role in the new movie, Million Dollar Baby 2, only to be replaced by Will Smith's kid.

Day Twenty: Reach out for help.

Thank God for Orlando's good spirit :) If he hadn't come to the Raisa Gorbachev Foundation Party to help raise funds, and hadn't brought girlfriend/supermodel Miranda Kerr (one of my favorite new girls btw) we still wouldn't have seen Miranda's boob slip. The slip is abnormaly small, but the girl is abnormaly hot, so I say it's worth it!

Introducing Kaley Cuoco, who is our first viewer nominated Honey Dip.  A 24 year old American actress, best known for her roles in The Big Bang Theory and 8 Simple Rules, she brings some blonde fire to the table.  I'll tell you that she has me sold on tuning in on Monday nights at 9:30pm to see that fine piece in uniform.